First of all, before I begin, I have to say this post is inspired by Melissa Donovan and the inspiring, encouraging and informative post she wrote. I didn’t want to fill up the comment area so I took it “home” so I can really express myself here. She’s good like that.
I’ve been asked a few times why I write. My answer is usually the same with a few variations, but overall it was comes to this: I have to. For me, writing is therapy. When I’m depressed, when I’m excited, when I’m confused and even when I’m bored… I need to grab a pen or a keyboard and express my feelings or thoughts or creations.
I’m convinced this is a gift/talent from God. And I’ve learned that if you don’t use these God-given gifts, He can take them away from you. I refuse to let it go and use it every chance I get. I carry a pen and usually a small notebook everywhere I go because I never know when I’ll need it. I’m constantly writing emails to myself so I don’t lose a thought that I can flesh out later.
I love the feeling of making an audience of 1 or 1,000 think about a moment in time, laugh out loud, or shed a tear. I enjoy taking them to other worlds or back to my childhood or a few months from now. I enjoy telling stories that people want to hear or just entertaining them for 5 minutes reading my blog. Close friends could tell you I don’t write short emails. Text messages almost never have shorthand. I love details too much and making whatever I write have my voice as if I was literally speaking to them. Writing is who I am.
I need to write not only for myself, but for my friends and family. They’ve got stories, as well as I, that need to be told. They have ideas, as well as I, that need to be heard. I put their thoughts or feelings into poetry, into characters I create, or just flesh out their ideas to make it not so confusing to them.
I do it for them because they support me and believe in me, and I can’t let them down. My parents were the first to encourage me that I can do anything if I put my mind to it every since I was wee, and I believed them. Of course, at my wee age, I had no idea what I wanted to do, but I had my options wide open. Furthermore, at my wee age, I was already writing poetry and short stories of my own… I just never knew that’s something I could build a career off of. And after I realized I’ve got a knack for this thing, and if I work hard and apply myself, I could be well paid and take care of those friends and family that support me. So in a sense, I’d be doing it for the money, but it won’t be for me. I don’t want to see my parents struggle with bills and whatnot. And I already promised people once I get to a point when I can help them succeed in their career, I’ll come back and get them. So I write because people are depending on me. Even if they aren’t, if I believe they are, it drives me.
And when it comes to a career, I took a long look at what the basis of entertainment is all about. I’m sure it’s much more than what I’m about to say, but two of the most important pillars of what enterainment is WRITING and PERFORMANCE. From music to movies, books to blogs, you can’t have most of what makes up the entertainment world without someone sitting down with a pen or at a computer typing out words. The performance comes in later after the words or written, or sometimes a performance is what inspires what’s written. But I include performance because I love improv which is unscripted.
I don’t do it for the fame, but I want to be recognized. I don’t do it for the money, but I want to be in the business. I know I’m going to fail a couple times, but that’s part of the road to success. I love writing. I love writing about writing. I love words. So much so, I’ve fathered words of my own. I may even name real child actual words. When and if I get tattoos, they will be words (vs pictures). I’m the anit-bling but if I had to get something platnium and diamond studded, it’s be a pen I can wear around my neck. (I actually have a silver one that works just fine that I wear when I perform poetry.)
So why do I write? Because I have to. I need to. I was born with a pen in my hand and I’ll probably go out with one… maybe in my pocket. I can’t stop and won’t stop. I may pause though. That’s why they made the pause button so you can resume after you took a potty emergency.